


Bi-curious

by Gaybrand



Series: one offs/short stories [17]
Category: Everyman HYBRID
Genre: Hand Jobs, Homophobic Language, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mutual Masturbation, Sexuality Crisis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-14
Updated: 2019-04-14
Packaged: 2020-01-13 02:31:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,793
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18459635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gaybrand/pseuds/Gaybrand
Summary: Jeff has alot of insecurities about himself and his place with his friends, any young adult does. But Evan seems to have it all figured out,  and jeff is more than a little envious.In fact hes not even sure how he feels towards evan anymore





	Bi-curious

**Author's Note:**

> Ive been in a...jeff n evan mood so i finished this up. Hopefully il get to writing my long fic soon ;-;
> 
> Anyway enjoy this and leave feedback!

They sat In a dark bedroom away from the noise of the party, both of them feeling fairly overwhelmed but still not wanting to be entirely alone. The conversation was light and casual, Evan teasing and Jeff rolling his eyes and rebutting. 

Why either of them were there was a mystery, they hadn't exactly been invited personally, and yet they were greeted jovially when they came despite the atmosphere they knew would be present. It only took about twenty minutes of music that was just slightly too loud and people who were slightly too drunk for evan to edge dangerously close to shutting down. Finding a bedroom that was empty aside from jeff was a damn miracle, and the taller man was a sight for stressed eyes. 

As it turned out to the surprise of no one in particular, evan and jeff enjoyed each other's company much more than that of inebriated strangers. Evan didn't notice the time passing by while they lounged in a stranger's home not unlike how they might in one of their own. They had both calmed down but didn't care enough to go back out and were trying to make the most of the evening by aggravating each other. 

At one point, Evan positioned himself on Jeff's lap, just meaning to tease him but Jeff seemed to have gone quiet immediately after. 

“is somethin wrong?” 

“uhm...no...uh...why...are you on me..”

“just playin around” 

“that's really ….gay man..”

“so?”

“so I'm not so get off.”

“ok..sorry.” Evan muttered getting off him and distancing himself. It's not like he minded giving Jeff his space, but it had never really been a problem before and he didn't understand what had happened. 

“why...is that suddenly a problem.” He asked after a minute.

“don't need people getting the wrong idea.” jeff huffed, uncommonly irritated. 

“there's no one fucking here.” Evan retorted cooly. 

“yeah well I don't...don't wanna make it a habit.”

“what are you so worried about?”

“if your always all over me people are gonna think something's up.”

“we've been like that since we were little and now all the sudden your worried people are gonna think some shit?”

“it's not all of the sudden just...i...want it to stop so you have to stop doing that.” 

“glad to know random people thinking shit is more important to you than us.” 

“not everyone is fine with being called a faggot all the damn time. “ Jeff snapped. “they only do it cus you're like that. I guess it doesn't bother you but it bothers me.”

“I'm not ‘fine with it’ I just know they're not gonna stop and if I let it get to me I'll do what you're tryin to do.” Evan shook his head trying not to be hurt by Jeff's assertions that it was his fault. 

“I'm not a fucking queer alright.”

“I didn't fucking say you were dickhead, no need to get all fuckin defensive. It doesn't really matter if you are they'll keep bothering you if they think they'll get a reaction.” 

Jeff was quiet, seeming sad and uncomfortable Evan didn't say anything else, frankly annoyed and not for the first time feeling alienated from his friends for not being straight. 

“look I don't...want you to feel bad for...that I didn't mean...that it's bad I just...i just don't…”

“it's fine.” evan waved it away, not really interested in jeffs apologetics, trying not to wonder if things would be different if he'd never told jeff about that aspect of himself.

“i don't...have a problem with you.” jeff insisted, evan doing his best not to roll his eyes. He wasn't going to give jeff an out for alleviating his guilt by forgiving him and taking his half assed apology. 

“id you didn't have a problem, this would be an issue in the first place”

“i just..don't like people thinking i'm…”

“it wouldn't matter what they think if you didn't have a problem with bein gay or whatever. You'd let em think think that if you didn't care,” evan stared at the carpet, standardly plain with staines that told stories about the rooms residents. “but you do care. You don't wanna be gay.” 

Silence, jeff staring at the floor, evan trying not to feel hurt, this was Jeff's problem after all, not his but still there was a lingering feeling that he was in some way, lesser. 

“i don't think i have a choice if i want to be or not.” jeff muttered. 

“well you can choose to be an asshole about it.” evan shrugged. Jeff sighed.

“you..you're right..sorry.” more silence, evan wondering what he'd been trying to say.

“you ever thought about it? Like seriously?” he asked, watching the other man furrow his brow. 

“...sorta i guess,” jeff shifted, “I don't know it's...it kinda changes alot.”

“what do ya mean?”

“like...i don't know I don't want to have to rethink everything..like do I wanna, look like him or do i..” jeff stopped sighing.

“we'll if you don't think about it you'll never know. It ain't gonna go away.”

“I guess I just...what if i'm...just gay..i'm pretty sure I like girls now but... ”

“well...so what? Is that such a bad thing?

“I'm worried yknow what...what if no one wants to be friends with me if...or..or my parents or Alex don't...want me “

“well...you shouldn't worry about what other people think you should worry more about bein happy. I don't know about your family but, yknow i...ill never think anything less of ya. I'll always be here.” evan assured him though his tone was kinder than before.

“...thank you..” 

“course man.” 

“sorry about...that...shit i said i…” 

“it's fine man.”

“it's it for real fine or is it Fine, fine?” jeff asked with some skepticism. 

“i mean it. I'm ok dude.” 

“alright.” jeff scooted closer and after a pause gave evan a sort of side hug that evan leaned into. They sat there eventually striking up a different conversation until it was late, they they hoth bit the bullet and snuck out and back home. 

The subject had been put to rest for the most part, for several weeks. Evan did his best to be less intrusive with the physical contact, and jeff notably diverted more insensitive comments and jokes others would make around Evan, while toning down even what he would say as well despite it never being that bad. Evan would appreciate that he'd gotten something from the conversation at least, even if jeff still adamantly insisted he was straight. Still, like all their arguments, it was forgotten about after a little while and their relationship stayed mostly the same. 

Evan stretched and flopped backwards onto Jeff's bed. They were hanging out at his house, jeff reading and Evan bothering him with whatever question or conversation topic came to mind. Evan didn't think about it now, but it had been the first time they'd hung out completely alone since the party. 

“your mom finally let you close the door huh?” he observed aloud.

“yeah well, you're not a girl so I guess she thinks nothing's gonna happen.” jeff shrugged flipping through pages in his book. 

“you're twenty though why does it matter anymore.” 

“guess she doesn't want grandkids yet i don't know man.” jeff chuckled, though he was blushing. “it's not like I ever bring anyone but you or vin here anyway.”

“I don't think she'd even know if you were doin anything.” 

“probably not. But still I never get to so..” jeff mumbled, something almost akin to jealousy in his tone though it wasn't directed at anyone in particular. 

“I could always help ya with that y'know.” 

Evan had offered jokingly as he usually did but when he did Jeff blushed and stuttered something about maybe not minding and evan felt his heart skip a beat. 

“what was that?”

“i...uhm...nevermind…”

“tell me.”

“it's...nothing.”

“dude tell me.” 

“i...i said I..guess i wouldn't mind...maybe…” Jeff swallowed, not finishing his sentence. 

“did you want to..uh try..try something like….” Evan started not prepared to just let it go.

“we...we’'ll get caught…” Jeff bit his lip looking over at the door nervously.

“we won't but if you don't want to that's ok.” 

“i…” Jeff seemed to be at a loss for words.

“it's ok man it was just a suggestion,kind of a joke really, didn't expect you to want to. ” evan rambled some excuse so as not to sound too invested in the idea. 

“i...i don't….not want to..” 

“Jeff, a yes or no will work man just tell me”

“i..i don't know…”

“alright then we won't.” Evan stated and Jeff seemed almost disappointed.

“evan i..i'm just nervous…” Jeff mumbled after a moment. 

“well...that's why I said we won't.”

“but...i don't know I want to try but i'm..i'm just…”

“look just...tell me what you want cus I'm kinda confused.”

“i...do...want to but i...am kinda...kinda scared and….i don't want to make things...weird between us.”

“well...if you do want to then we can, we don't have to do too much and it won't be weird to me.” 

“are you sure?”

“yeah man I've seen plenty of my friends naked it's not a big deal.” Evan shrugged, only half joking and Jeff seemed to consider it for a moment. 

“you'll stop?” Jeff asked looking over at him, “like if I..if I said to you'd stop right?”

“of course, right away.” Evan assured, petting his knee. Jeff nodded and, setting his book on the floor, sat up on his knees, pausing there awkwardly and then taking off his hoodie. He was wringing his hands and avoiding looking directly at Evan. 

“uh...i uhm..i don't know what...to do..” jeff stuttered and Evan couldn't help but smirk a swelling of confidence in his chest.

“is this what you do with girls?”

“well...well usually we….sorta...kiss but…” 

“do you not start anything?”

“.....n..no..”

“would you like me to?” Evan tried to keep the amusement out of his voice, jeff nodded sheepishly and he smiled and adjusted his body so he could reach him easier. He leaned forward but found that, inexplicably, he was nervous as well. 

They kissed after a second of hesitance and the awkwardness dissipated though it took a bit to figure out what felt comfortable. Evans hand found the back of his neck and Jeff's rested on his shoulder. They almost broke apart as if realizing what was happening but seemed to ignore it and kiss one another again with renewed vigor. 

Evan braved both moving his hands to other parts of jeff's body and gently slipping his tongue in his mouth, both of which jeff took to eagerly. Jeff also took this as permission to do the same to evan and the both of them very quickly started getting very into it. 

“this ok?” evan murmured, jeff nodding hardly before Evan had finished speaking. “should i do more?” he ran his hands up jeffs thighs earning him the softest little moan and a “yes..please.” 

Evan undid Jeff's jeans, he was already a little hard and when Evan looked up at him he wasn't looking at him and seemed nervous. 

“....sorry.” jeff mumbled when he noticed Evan looking at him. 

“what are ya sorry for.” 

“uhm...i don't...i don't know what I'm….doing

“shhh it's not a test…” 

Evan pulled out jeffs dick and leaned in to kiss him reassuringly. He was by no means large but rather cute. Jeff was endearingly bashful but clearly not unhappy. 

“pretty boy,” evan cooed without thinking, leaving soft kisses along his neck and jaw. 

Evan slowly moved his hand from the base of jeff's cock to the head,Jeff gasped and Evan glanced up at him to make sure he was still fine, he was biting his lip with his face flushed and Evan noticed him gripping the blankets under him.

“you ok?”

“y..yeah..d, do that again,” jeff mumbled his voice barely audible, he covered his mouth as if embarrassed and Evan could only grin. 

“I'm not hardly touchin ya,” Evan whispered next to his ear, well aware he was probably going to embarrass jeff. “relax a little sweetheart.”

Jeff whined and Evan chuckled a little but did as he'd asked, stroking his cock again and leaning in offering a kiss that Jeff shyly but eagerly took. 

Evan made a point to explore his body with his hands, along his side and chest and belly, anywhere that could use a gentle touch, which was everywhere. One hand getting him off and the other petting his face or rubbing his thighs. Evan moved away from his mouth to get a good look at his expression, jeff looked blissful his face hot, eyes nearly closed and lips parted slightly letting soft gasps escape. 

“w..what.” jeff whispered noticing evan stare.

“you're beautiful.” 

Jeffs reddened face and neck and almost loving expression caused evans stomach to flutter and all he could do was kiss him again. He almost marveled how fast this escalated, except he was too engrossed in his actions. 

Jeff reached over and groped Evans crotch through his jeans and Evan found himself accidentally moaning into Jeff's mouth. Evans face flushed and when jeff looked him over, smiling sheepishly, he couldn't meet his eye. 

“you're uhm...enjoying this.” Jeff commented, Evan flushed more, unsure of if he was asking something or teasing.

“yeah…”

“can...i. do you want me to...uhm...help” Jeff stuttered, surprising probably both of them. 

“uh..if you wanna..” Evan shifted, wanting him to but feeling both awkward and embarrassed. Jeff took this as encouragement and pulled him a little closer and gripped his thighs momentarily before unzipping his jeans and pulling out his cock. Evan was pretty sure he couldn't see it, but grunted softly when jeff ran his fingers along it, exploring. He had to force himself not to grind his hips into jeffs hand and for as excited as he was, he couldn't help but feel somewhat embarrassed for how hard he got from just being touched. He felt jeff smirk some against his lips.

“wow...exited..” jeff murmured. 

Jeff had a hold of Evans dick and was jerking him off in time as best as he could. The both of them softly gasping and letting out other gently desperate sounds. Jeff's gasping getting more shallow and heavy. Evan moved faster savoring the whining, adoring jeffs voice. 

Jeff came with a soft, muffled whine as he covered his mouth with his own hand, embarrassed. Evan went to pull it away but Jeff moved it himself, grabbing a fitful of Evans hair and pressing their lips together more forcefully. Evan having no chance to tell him he didn't have to finish him off. 

Evan buried his face in Jeff's shoulder trying not to be as loud as he wanted to be. Jeff picked up his pace, leaning in to whisper soft words of praise in his ear. Evan could feel his legs shaking and his voice faltering the closer he got. There was a certain bliss achieved by reaching orgasm with a man who he'd been inseparable from for years, murmuring gentle words to him about how beautiful he was the whole time. He wouldn't be able to describe it, but rather at least lived it and knew it wasn't something he was going to forget or disregard. 

It was over far to soon, but when it was they both collapsed, laying backwards on Jeff's bed with their limbs still intertwined. Evan didn't stop kissing him, jeff returning it gently. 

“you ok?” evan murmured.

“yeah...uhm..”

“what is it?”

“just...uhm...that was nice I just...you didn't want to do...do more did you?” Jeff asked, rather boldly all things considered.

“I uhm...i think that's a little...much for now. Plus we wouldn't want you mom to come in.” Evan didn't like rejecting him but it was alot and frankly he didn't know if it was Jeff who he was looking out for. 

“yeah..yeah that's true.” Jeff nodded, clearly a little disappointed. 

“ain't you supposed to be straight?”

“uh...i …” Jeff looked almost mortified, Evan would have teased more but decided against it.

“I'm joking baby, don't worry about it.” 

“right...we should probably get some sleep huh?” 

“i guess...but only as long as i aint gotta go anywhere..” Evan bargained, petting Jeff's hair and face, delighting in how cute he looked. 

“like id let you go anywhere after that.”


End file.
